You have to do stuff that average people don't understand, because those are the only good things
-Andy Warhol

Friday, December 3, 2010

10 Literary Devices from Catch 22

1) Repetition
 "Help him, help him" (p.50)

2)Allusion
"John Milton is a sadist" (p.97)

3) Paradox
"If he flew [planes] he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to he was sane and had to. " (p.46)

4) Situational Irony
" Clevinger was a genius... a Harvard undergraduate... [going] far in the academic world... In short, he was a dope" (p. 68)

5) Dramatic Irony
"Yossarian was in the hospital with a pain in his liver that fell just short of being jaundice. The doctors were puzzled by the fact that it wasn't quite jaundice" (p. 7)

6) Symbolism
"He never sends anyone home, anyway. He just keeps them waiting around waiting for rotation orders until he doesn't haven enough men left for the crews, and then raises the number of missions and throws them all back on combat status. He's been doing that ever since he got here" (p.102)

7) Verbal Irony
"I don't have nightmares" (p. 54)

8) Alliteration
"If the colonel says we have to fly fifty-five missions, we have to fly them" (p. 65)

9)Motif
"I don't want to fly milk runs" (p.103)

10) Foreshadowing
"Do you remember... that time in Rome when that girl who can't stand you kept hitting me over and over the head with the heel of her shoe? Do you want to know why she was hitting me?" (p. 25)

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Think Twice Before Leaping, and Do It at the Right Time

My morality is driven by something easily said but often difficult to follow, it's having to "think before I act".  As an only child, my sheltered upbringing was heavily influenced by Filipino culture and by Catholic religion. Like most children, I have learned to distinguish both right and wrong and to also learn to consider the aftermath after every decision.  Growing up under the watchful eye of my family, I was disciplined to conform to my family's standards and must address my elders with honorifics, because any failure to comply would risk punishment. Also, in church I was taught of the scriptures and the ten commandments in order to recognize what good I can perform just as the Bible says, or else face the the punishment of the afterlife. I was taught this because of my intuitive behavior, where I would work hard to achieve my objectives or do things without thinking. I would react in a way that may seem appalling to others, therefore I would change into a different state that they are more comfortable around with (this may explain why I do a lot of acting). This morality is similar to how a person would change from being energetic around his peers to being professional around superiors because there is a right time and place to for everything. For example some situations may require for my cheerful and humorous self, and some situations may call for my seriousness.

What motivates me is the idea of having my crowd feel comfortable in my presence because I would like to live my life peacefully without the teenage drama that might hinder me from my ambitions and school work. It's not that I fear the "drama", don't get me wrong because I enjoy living life to the fullest and I encounter problems almost everyday. I am not afraid to face dilemmas for I am capable of solving them calmly and still remain my integrity. What makes me try avoid problems is because of a pet peeve of wasting valuable time. I am free spirited, I like to do things that I want to do, but as a student I have responsibilities of balancing basic school work and extracurricular activities. I want to direct my time and energy towards something that is more useful and beneficial for me, such as my ambition to go to a good university. My goals require my hard work, but as a teenager I would like to have some sort of "life" just without the explicit drama. When I have to make a decision, or  when i face a dilemma, I try to carefully think about those who are involved and I make an effort so that the result is beneficial or compromising. There are moments when I might break rules I was given for curious reasons or because its the only solution, but I still consider the feelings of others and face the consequence fearlessly.  I like having to quickly and successfully solve problems, but if I the problem calls for my deep articulation then I would respond positively towards it and finish what I started. I am  not a pushover; I can be loyal and obedient, but I am only like that to those, who I think, deserve it because sometimes I couldn't care less for the opinions of those who hold annoyance or detestation towards me (unless a situation calls for me to direct my attention towards them). It may seem like a selfish motivation, but I find that fair, and besides I find joy in helping others. My morality reflects the feelings of others motivated by my own reasons of wanting live a less troublesome life.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

I am Now Very Starstrucked

Okay, (one of )my favorite bloggers just  emailed me back so my inner self is doing cartwheels (something I can't do in my narrow bedroom) while singing Broadway songs.  I'm suffering a joyous headache from my overactive brain. Thanks you, Arabelle Sicardi for the advice :)

I scream in excitement, and I'm good *faints from happiness*  .

Friday, October 29, 2010

Fear of Flying Solo

 I do not fear of failing because I there is normality and chances of improvement in imperfection. I do not fear rejection because I trust my creativity and wit to fulfill the opportunity that I have failed to receive. I do not fear change because I love an adventure. I do not fear the public because I can conform from my unconventionality, and benefit from whatever remarks I am given. Despite my bravery and this "heroine" image I deliver, there lies a frailness that I am not too comfortable in admitting.

Beyond my talents and skill lies a quiet and ominous person, but that's someone no one wants to be with. Hence I become a different person on the outside, loud, ebullient and talkative; become a contagious energy that appeals to my crowd. My chattiness keeps the energy constantly moving in order to avoid the silent awkwardness.  Depending on the crowd or to my instincts, my attitude changes just so whoever I am conversing with is comfortable in my presence. However, within every change I become, I wonder where I benefit from all this. At times I lose myself, and forget the person that I normally am. I do this with hope of finally being able to fit within a crowd, but I remain a walking ghost. That is the fear, to be forever alone and not have any significant memories. Its not that I cannot live without attention, but rather that I am fearful of loneliness.


For example, my daily life includes having to entertain people with my abilities in the Arts. As my audience and I exchange words of gratitude, I become satisfied and content. However, there will be one day when my talents will be useless and I will become incapable of my profession . And when that day comes, I wonder who will treasure me wholesomely. Besides my parents, I wonder if there will ever be a person beyond my family who would still consider me, for me. It scares me because I wonder when I finally become an adult and seek independence, the reality  no longer resembles highs school where the possibilities of friendships are everywhere and I don't know who to trust. Most importantly I happen to be a horrible person to converse with due to the speed of my speech, my ability to make situations awkward, and the overall fact I can be a boring person to converse with.

Another reason I fear loneliness is because I have suffered a great loneliness that is both saddening yet natural. When I was twelve, at the same year two of my good friends have died, and I thought that I would never find the same friends again. The once person I was able to connect with, talk with and patiently listen to was no longer on this Earth. The irony is I have a fear of loneliness but I sometimes have negative thoughts about having close friends again. I don't assume that I would lose a friend to death, but generally the idea of being alone again. Also because ever since I moved to Canada, my other friends, ones whom I've grown up with, are no longer with me. They are no longer here to  comfortably talk and reminisce childhood with. However, I enjoy the idea of having new friends, but finding a person that I can compatibly sync with is completely different and a hard thing to do.


When someone asks me what I'm afraid of, instantly I answer that its rats. I also suffer musophobia (fear of rats) and begin to zealously and dramatically describe my abhorrence towards those disease carrying and decay-smelling cretins. However, my positivity serves as a barrier to protect me from possibilities of getting hurt again, or to mask my weakness. Death is inevitable, disappointing but natural; I've moved on. I also don't look forward to the day I become unnecessary, because I have big ambitions and I want to focus on them for now. If I keep thinking about being lonely (again) or being ineffectual, they are most likely to happen. Therefore I keep a bright and spunky composure, and try to forget about all my fears.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Nonsensical Dilemma's

I have found three significant quotes in my novel Catch-22 by Joseph Heller.
First, I have finally encountered the meaning of Catch-22 in chapter five. Doc Daneeka has the responsibility to forbid the pilots from flying because he is crazy, but he says that everybody is crazy, however he cannot ground them. Why? Because there's a catch, and it is related to one of my significant quotes in the novel. Catch-22 specifies that  a soldier can get out of combat duty by being grounded and "all he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions" (46) .   Catch-22 is practically a dilemma, because even if a soldier calls himself crazy, with a purpose to be discharged from the army, he must continue completing his missions. Meaning if a pilot asks to get out, then he isn't insane. therefore is suited to continue fighting. In my opinion, its a stupid yet simple process to keep soldiers stationed, that is why Yossarian, the protagonist, is trying to get out.

My second quote is related to how the soldiers are stationed, despite completing the missions they were given. For example, Hungry Joe, a member of Yossarian's squadron, has flown the most missions out of everyone, therefore he remains stationed. When he first completed his first combat tour of duty, which were, twenty five missions, he anticipated having to return home. However, colonel Cathcart would continue raising the number of missions, and Hungry Joe must remain in the army. I felt a strong sense of sympathy when Hungry Joe "unpacked his bags and rewrote the happy letters home", and he has to continue waiting for his return home (53). I felt that (that) quote is significant because it seemed unfair that despite a soldier's efforts (Hungry Joe completed fifty missions), he would still remain stationed and slowly watch his comrades suffer and die.

My third quote contributes to why Yossarian continues scheming his way out of the army. My first impression of him was because of his superior-complex. He thinks he must be immortal or die trying, because he was simply too good to die (aforementioned on my previous blog post on this novel). However as I continue reading on, I begin to realize the purpose of why Yossarian must escape his combat duties.
History did not demand Yossarian's premature demise, justice could be satisfied without it, progress did not hinge upon it, victory did not depend on it. That men would die was a matter of necessity; which men would die, though, was a matter of circumstance, and Yossarian was willing to be the victim of anything but circumstance. But that was war. 
(p 68)
 He cannot endure having to continue witnessing the death of his comrades and also he does not wish to be among them. Yossarian's plans of leaving the army is not because of his narcissism but to escape the traumatic experiences of war.

This novel is focuses on the the idea of Anti-War, as most characters try to have themselves discharged the army by working hard to complete their combat duties, or simply by faking-illnesses or calling themselves mentally challenged.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Der is a Ryt Place 4 Evrything

I believe that English is constantly changing into an indisputable state as it presently keeps doing so. Texism is one of English's hugest influences as words are being abbreviated, phrases are ebing minimized into acronyms, and emotions are being expressed into alpha-numerical-symbolic facial expressions (also known as emoticons). When I was given my first cellphone, I felt that having to include numbers to replace vowels in some words, misspelling letters as a pun-reference, capitalizing random letters and inventing hybrid-words would reflect my creative personality and gave a technological feel to it. As I matured, I realized that it was unnecessary and doing so made no difference to the point I was proving, and I have also confused the reader. However I still use some abbreviations to directly respond to the sender within the touch of a few buttons in order to save time.
In response to the topic's question, I don't find texism as a degradation to English but I believe that it is a tool of simplification and there is a right time and place to use it.

Texting was invented as an excuse for not returning calls (plus its cheaper), and I find amusement in using abbreviation as slang during informal situations. However, when I talk to my superiors, or in my homework, I refrain from doing so in order to appear professional, reliable, and as a form of respect. For example,  if I emailed my manager "I'm afraid I cant involb int da voluntyr nxt w-day coz i 4got i had a dentist appt. srry" would this prove that I am intelligent and in accordance to the trend? I don't think so.

Secondly, simplifying classic literature, such as Shakespeare's works,  into texism and abbreviations, I believe, is also unacceptable. For example, the fact that students learn poetry is so that they can develop a deeper thinking within the elaboration of its statement, and therefore create their own individuality through creating different translations. This practice just promotes laziness and impatience.

Maybe it's because humans haven't fully integrated into this new language, but languages will change eventually. History determines it, as humans before have developed from using Old English to the modern English. For now, texism is just an invention for convenience sake in order to save time, or, within a group of peers, for fun. I close by saying: Dis wuz fun, myb 4 fun's sak3 l3ts mk3 a powrfull essay thru texisms. BWAHAHAHAAHAHAHA =D!

Friday, October 1, 2010

Too Good To Die

In the story Catch-22 by Joseph Heller, Yossarian, the protagonist, has a superior complex that has become his purpose to avoid any chances of involvement in the war. He believes that everyone he meets, including strangers, have a tendency to kill him because he is a paragon; Yossarian is "Assyrian" and "had a sound mind in a pure body", therefore he also thinks he is hated by the jealousy of others. Yossarian is not lazy but he thinks highly of himself that in every mission he is given, accomplishment was not significant to him because his goal is "to live forever or die in attempt" ( p 29).
Yossarian's character has a very likable charm that doesn't appeal to a lot of the other characters, however I find it very amusing as it adds to the humor in the story.  For example, Yossarian uses a lot redundancy when conversing with others. For example, when he was stationed at the hospital, pretending to be sick, he would flatter the naive champlain in an attempt to elongate his stay. The champlain and Yossarian have very awkward conversations that they would reply to one another with the same previous sentence. In another example, at camp, whenever his comrades call him paranoid, he would retaliate back by repeating those statements, and the questions would result into unnecessary nonsensicalities. This reflects the wit Yossarian has, behind his god-like complex. What intrigues me most however is that with  inconsideration and his purpose to survive independently, I wonder what his purpose was when he joined the army. Also, I wonder what other preposterous and cheating schemes he would make to abstain from his call of duty.  I predict that I as I continue reading, probably his reasons would slowly begin to make sense. 

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Me Against My Canvas


 The canvas mocks me  with its emptiness, and I feel the awkward glances  from my classmates  because it has almost been thirty minutes and I still  have not yet  started my painting.  The project was "simple",  sixteen of my classmates had to  create a reflective and symbolic self-portrait of ourselves. The  challenge is that only three of my class's best paintings are chosen to  receive an art scholarship, which is actually an exclusive art class  taught by a famous artist. When I pick up my paintbrush, I feel a  tightening inside my throat and a cold rush that stiffens my movements.   The focus of my class is intimidating as their  working paintbrushes echoes the room and juices of their colorful  creative energy are successfully becoming masterpieces. Even as I remind  myself of the importance of this opportunity, and about all the  people  I wish to impress, it does not inspire me much confidence.  My canvas  remains a blank white sheet. What is wrong with me?

I  imagine looking at my true self and she glowers at me with her clouded  eyes. Her eyebrows furrow, signaling for me to leave her in solitude.  This person is the one I hide behind my facade. She is not shy, but  defensive, yet also sensitive because she is afraid of looking worthless or amateur amongst her peers. This is my challenge, to captivate my  audience by artistically interpreting my strength, when obviously on the  inside its the complete opposite. I am lost in my pessimism which  comforts me more because I always feel like its the truth, or some sort  of salvation to remind myself to change.The fear of rejection is now  interfering with my creative thinking, and as I look at the clock I see  it mocking me too.

Breathe in and out Roena, you can do  this. I remember my school's art teacher's advice: "Don't think, just  do!" and try to forget about the pressure that is being placed so my  painting may  seem more natural. However as I compare myself to my  classmates who are easily battling themselves, I sit poker-faced trying  to perfect myself because I know that I don't have a chance. I can make my painting look beautifully  imperfect, and also risk looking like a mess. I try to focus again as I shut the world and  motivate myself with the music in my iPod. The bass strums at the same time as my heart, and the guitar rush strikes me with energy. My hand is  now twitching to move as I pick up my brushes and paints.

My  brain categorizes the possible symbols that could represent me, and  I  tackle those ideas and try to transform them into a piece of art. I am  now inspired to do a dark motif with bright details to represent the  potential within me. At the same time I also try not to think of the  competition, before I go into another melancholic episode. The  paintbrushes are now dancing unto the canvas to my music and I am  beginning to see the talent I grew within years.

Unfortunately,  I am now out of time as I hurriedly create details and correct mishaps.  Three figures are now standing by the doorway, and they carry a professional mystique despite their unique  appearance and sense of style, and as they scan the classroom they  remind each of us that we are merely students. My anxiety returns  because these people were the admission committee. In a random order  they observe and critique each student's work, and praise them for their  creativity or criticize their vague organization. Finally it was my  turn, and my reply was the "mediocre nod", and they immediately went on to the next painting. I knew it, I didn't really have a chance. One member of the committee, whose name I  forgot, looks at me disappointingly and tells me that my painting could  reflect a lot more about myself, and my art teacher gives me the same look too.
 
  Despite not getting the scholarship, I feel lighthearted  because as I look at my painting I think it motivates me to step away from my shadow, accept my mistakes, to smile and to breathe. I cannot reflect myself based on the expectations of the people I want to impress. Sometimes, I just have to be myself, and realize the greatness within me. However as my pessimism continues to challenge me, I begin to see the bright side within it.  I know I can  change because this time I want to.